little black journal

The annual roundup!  2022 started quiet as my maternity leave and long days at home wound down, but life seemed to pick up speed as the year went on and now I’m reeling over the fact that Juliette’s third grade year is nearly half over.  And were those tulips I saw in the Trader Joes flower aisle on Sunday?!  Some days were long, but dang, the year was fast.  Below is the best of the best…

 

Favorite book:

24 books last year!  A new record for me!  And a good mix of poetry, non-fiction, memoir, and fiction.  

Favorite book of all was A Gentleman in Moscow by Amor Towles.  It’s the fictional story of a charming man placed under house arrest in a famed Moscow hotel and it just…swept me up.  

Favorite non-fiction was The Line Becomes a River by Francisco Cantu, because for as many times as I’ve heard the phrase “crisis at the border”, I haven’t spent enough time considering the humans at the center of that crisis.  Cantu makes it real.  

 

Favorite TV show:

Top honors to Bad Sisters.  I started this on a whim one evening after the kids were in bed, put it away for a few weeks, and after watching episode 2 on a morning when I had the house to myself, I followed with episodes 3, 4, 5 that very same day…such dark, smart humor.  Such love among sisters.  Such intense, intense hatred for the villain!  The mark of good character development.

 

Favorite movie:

CODA!  This movie was beautiful and sweet and shed new light for me on life without hearing.  The main character (who is not hearing-impaired) is an incredible singer, but can’t fully share her talent with her deaf parents and brother.  That scene in the auditorium through the mother’s eyes when all is perfectly silent – so powerful.  And when the dad puts his hands on his daughter’s vocal cords to feel her sing You Are All I Need to Get By.  I smiled and cried and felt all the things.

Honorable mention to Nope, even though I watched a good portion of it with my face hidden behind a blanket, but sometimes being scared is fun.

 

Favorite podcast:

Top honors to Glennon Doyle’s We Can Do Hard Things.  I admit, I don’t listen to all the episodes (I don’t have the emotional bandwidth to unpack all the things!), but I’ve loved her handful of parenting-focused episodes with Dr. Becky and really love the glimpse I get of how her and Abby do life together.

 

Favorite song:

You know it!  T-Swift again!  And I’m not gonna apologize.  Everyone in our family has loved the album Midnights a little more with each additional listen and I’m smitten with Maroon in particular.  It’s a bop.  

 

Favorite purchase:

I got new eyeballs last year!  Or at least it they felt new after I finished my Lasik surgery in October.  And it’s been a game-changer.  To wash my face and brush my teeth and then just go to bed, without the fuss of contacts!  To SEE in the morning, without fumbling for my glasses!  I’m a new woman.

 

Favorite personal pastime:

I’ve been working on carving out a couple hours of solo coffee shop time every week or two, to read or write with a latte in hand and it’s been life-giving on a level that’s almost ridiculous.  But do you know what my favorite way to pass the time was in 2022?  I super-duper loved my naps with Isaac in our cozy gray chair.  I know, it’s hardly personal time and it’s hardly a hobby, but it’s how I chose to spend so many of my afternoons and I don’t regret any of it.  It’s not a pastime that will make it on this list any other year going forward, so I’m doubling down on all those times I chose not to put him in his crib.  Plus, all the reading I got done as he dozed in my arms!  When do you think I plowed through those 24 books?

 

Favorite family pastime:

Our summer family bike rides to the library and the brewery and the swimming pool were a sweet Sunday ritual.  I love these people and I love that clunky orange Rad Wagon and I love where we live.

 

And, favorite moments…

A magical, misty morning in Winthrop.

 

Maternity leave coffee walks with my boy.

 

Watching big sis show little bro the world.  Or the local playgrounds, at least.

 

An Alki nursing session while Juliette danced in the sand.

 

MAUI.

 

We’ve got a crawler!

 

Softball Saturdays.

 

Proud Mama moment.

 

On those days that I had him nap in his crib, I was rewarded post-sleep with the sweetest of smiles.

 

An Idaho Fourth.

 

A Mama-Jules hike.

 

So many sibling couch cuddles.

 

Summer days at Colman Pool, where Juliette passed her first swim test!

 

The loveliest sunset paddle with my best first mate.

 

Our smiles say it all.  This was BIG.

 

But also, it’s the little things.

 

The dreamiest Bainbridge Weekend.

 

The happiest of reunions.

 

He’s ONE!

 

Sunset fishing to cap off our best-yet trip to Minnesota.

 

And she’s NINE!

 

Evening walks with my little buddies.

 

The best birthday bike ride.

 

Autumn joy.

 

Sometimes he’s so happy it’s silly.

 

And we’ve got a walker!

 

A cozy, quiet Thanksgiving.

 

The prettiest tree hunt.

 

A most favorite tradition.

 

Girlie is growing up and I’m here for it!

 

Sharing the Christmas magic.

 

Sometimes it’s fun to leave the baby at home.

 

CHEERS.

 

I’m feeling that familiar mix of gratitude and melancholy in looking back at a year gone by.  Oh, this season has been been full…full of joy and exhaustion and laughter and runny noses and so much heart-bursting love as we fall harder for our fourth wheel.  Sometimes I fear that life will never be this sweet again.  And that’s probably true – I’m not sure that baby snuggles can be topped on the sweetness scale.  But I also know in my core that there is more ahead.  More pool days and sibling shenanigans and sunset paddles and hopefully more sleep.  There’s definitely more.

I just took the stockings down and cleared my collection of bottle brush trees from our mantle this week – the holidays were a little hard to let go of this year (as in all years, to be honest).  They were just so slow and sweet and packed with time with my favorite people.

We came home from Portland to a couple of unopened gifts under the tree, which the kids made quick work of tearing into…

And then we laid out a game plan for the rest of the week.  Isaac’s school was open, but Juliette’s was not, so we took advantage of the three-of-us time to do some cross-country skiing at Cabin Creek.

It was snowy that day and we loved gliding through the fresh powder.  This course really pushed the limits of Juliette’s and my Nordic downhill skills, but we did it!

The uphill slog:

And the downhill glide.

Proud of you, Kiddo!

Juliette has passed my shoulders and is approaching nose-height – this kid is going to be taller than her mama in no time, it seems…

On Thursday, Shane and Juliette headed out for a downhill day at Snoqualmie with a couple of Juliette’s friends.  They had a blast, zipping down the slopes.  I had a blast, binge-watching Bad Sisters back at home under a pile of blankets.  It’s rare that I have the house to myself, and I made it count!

We did pick up Isaac a bit early from daycare those days, so that he wasn’t completely left out of the fun.

And we checked a couple last things off our holiday bucket list, like a visit to the Menashe House (Juliette missed round one last month).

I had postponed my annual getaway to Cedarbrook with Nance and LaV earlier in December, but we made up for it on New Years Eve Eve.  There was shopping and movies and dinner at the hotel bar and ice cream in bed and lots of overdue catching up.  Life gets busy, but it feels good to know we can count on this tradition to stitch us back together!

And then New Years Eve!  The big bash!  Our nearest and dearest came over that evening after Isaac was in bed, and we ate tacos and drank all kinds of things and told lots of stories.

(Story time with Aunt Nance in action!)

We struggled to find a playlist that appropriately matched the vibe of the evening and so I put out a call for 90’s song requests; suddenly we were embarking on a three-hour dance party, bopping to REM and Offspring and Warren G.  Jason’s got moooooooves.

Juliette looked at us like the crowd of tragically un-hip 40-somethings that we are, but couldn’t resist getting in on the Boot Scootin’ Boogie.

Kris Kross makes you jump-jump?  Things got progressively sillier as the night went on.

There was a 10:30 pm Domino’s order and some intense debate over Nirvana vs. Pearl Jam and then we toasted at 11:15 pm as the nine year olds’ energy was waning. 

People split and the house was suddenly very quiet and then suddenly not-quiet as Isaac started crying while I was brushing my teeth.  He must have sensed that he just missed out on an epic party, so I ended up rocking my dozing boy as the clock struck officially midnight.  I think I got the best of both worlds.

New Years morning brought the annual Polar Bear Plunge at Alki Beach.  Juliette was feeling extra-bold again this year and decided to join her dad.

All smiles pre-plunge!

But then reality hit…

And then my poor girl really wasn’t happy.

Isaac was like, “What were you thinking?!”

It took a hot minute, but once Juliette was re-bundled her smile came back.  She’s much braver than her mama!

Cheers, polar bears, to a fresh new year!

We got a bonus break day as school and work were closed on January 2nd, so we decided to give Cabin Creek another go, this time with Buddy on board.

Isaac fussed a little as we were getting him strapped in, but once Shane started to cruise he fell silent and zoned out in the very best way.

The snow was icy and super-fast that day; Juliette and I both took a couple of falls and there was a moment when I wanted to chuck my skis into the woods and just walk back to the car, but we stuck with it and eventually re-found our joy.

Sweet dreams, little boy.

We spent our final afternoon together cozying down at home, having tickle fights and doing puzzles and playing piano.

One last nap together, and then it was back to business with a vengeance.  January has felt a bit nuts, work-wise, but oh, those lazy holi-daze.  They were awfully good.

Christmas 2022!  When we saw news of an ice storm moving across the PNW, we moved up our travel plans and jetted down to Portland the moment Shane wrapped up work on Thursday.  We got caught in some pretty slippery conditions two-thirds of the way there, but carefully crawled over those last 50 miles and safely arrived at Mitch’s house by 10pm.  The plan was to quietly transfer a sleeping Isaac from his car seat to his Pack N Play, but he only dozed a bit on the ride down and then was so amped up by the adventure of it all that we let him run circles in the living room for thirty minutes before tucking him in.

Friday was icy and the city was largely shut down.  We stayed close to home, venturing only as far as the neighborhood Starbucks for cocoa and coffee.

We thawed out under fluffy blankets…

And then we hunkered, with music and video games and several rounds of Christmas tree hide and seek.

Isaac was completely stir-crazy by dinnertime, so I took him out for a slushy spin on the sled.  I mean, we packed the puffy suit – may as well use it!

The kiddos (one little kiddo in particular) were up early on Saturday, so I stretched out on the couch with them and a cup of coffee while the sun came up.

Early wake-up means early naptime.  These daily dozes with my boy were one of my favorite things about the holiday break.

Bina kept a very close eye on Isaac throughout the week – she’s accustomed to being the main recipient of family doting and seemed a little put out by having to share the love.

Lunchtime donut run to Blue Star for my favorite passionfruit cacao raised glazed…

And then more lounging.

And naptime Part II!  Captured by a little spy…

Isaac’s cousins were so good with him – I was impressed by Morgan’s patience for unending games of “roll the ball and clap”.

The annual Christmas Eve viewing of The Polar Express was cozy as ever, though we missed my mom and dad, who were delayed in arriving due to the weather.

These kids may not believe in Santa anymore, but bless their hearts for playing along with the magic of it all.

Christmas morning!  Let the games begin!

The wrapping paper flew and the kids were all delighted and delightful and it just felt so good to see them each express joy in their very own way.

Juliette is still very much impressed by the little things and I love it.

Juliette’s three big wish list items were pierced ears, a fancy coat, and high-heeled boots.

She got two out of the three and seemed plenty pleased!

Isaac became smitten with this shopping cart as we were browsing the toy aisle at Target in early December and pushed it all around the store while I finished my shopping.  He was thrilled to see it reappear under the Christmas tree.

The calm after the flurry is so wonderful.

Did I say calm?  I meant toy-induced hysteria.

You do you, Buddy.

What are you looking at, Bina?

Oh, Bina.  

BINA!

We napped mid-day and did some puzzling and then made cupcakes for that evening’s dessert.

We Facetimed with Shane’s parents after lunch and then did some gaming, both virtual and in-real-life…

My parents arrived around 2:00 and another pile of gifts appeared under the tree!

Shane and Mitch drew each other’s names for our Secret Santa exchange and ended up trading pickle balls.  It seems they have similar interests…

Juliette got me a pretty pair of earrings and then wondered aloud if maybe she could borrow them someday…

WHEW!  Officially, the gift bonanza was a wrap.

We had our traditional country ham for dinner and Mitch and Kathryn opened some extra-special wine and the cupcakes the girls served for dessert were the perfect bow on a perfect day.

Monday was open and agenda-less, though Isaac once again missed the memo on sleeping in…

Bina greeted Isaac that morning with a look that said, “You’re still here?!”

Whatever my dad is selling in this game of Sushi Go, Juliette and Morgan clearly aren’t buying…

The afternoon stir-crazies started to set in…

And so we got out, for a rainy walk at Lake Oswego.

More gaming…

And the finishing touches on one hell of a puzzle.

We played a rousing round of Code Names before dinner and though I can’t recall what was so funny, I do remember my Dad literally laughing so hard he cried, which had all of us rolling.  Isaac was sitting on my lap and yukked it up with the rest of us – he hadn’t the foggiest idea what was going on, but he knew it was fun.

Tuesday was our departure day, so we snapped a few final family pics, let Isaac do another 37 loops around the house with his shopping cart, and packed it up.

Thank you again, Jarrells, for sharing your home and your wine and especially your love.

Isaac: the ever-endearing little rascal…  Funny and affectionate and irresistibly round-bellied, but into everything.  He’s learned how to open doors and cabinets and drawers and constantly rummaging, like a little raccoon in a field of garbage bins.  Toys, clothes, shampoo bottles, markers, measuring cups – he’s a human tornado.  He can’t resist the mystery of a closed door, so I’ve lost all vestiges of privacy (locked doors will drive this boy to sheer madness!).  Shut him out of the bathroom, and he will bang the damn door down.  Shut him in, and suddenly we’re in a game of hallway peek-a-boo.

He likes making a racket almost as much as he likes making a mess – favorite toys are anything that can be rung (xylophone), tooted (recorder), or banged on (recorder on xylophone!).  

Baby boy is consistently sleeping through the night, snoozing solidly from 7pm to 6am, but when he wakes at 6am (or even 5:30), he is UP.  Bottles and nursing and rocking be damned, he is UP.  I’ve stopped fighting it and scoop him out of his crib, pausing with him in the rocking chair just long enough to free him from his sleep sack before he wriggles out of my lap and beelines for the hallway.  I shuffle along behind him and we set up our living room nest, laying out our thickest blanket on the floor and turning on the fire.  Toy bins are pulled out from under the couch, milk is poured into a bottle and warmed, a snack cup is filled with Cheerios.  And then we settle in – I’ll lay down with a book or with nothing, if I’m especially tired, and Isaac will play with his toys or fidget with my Kindle and life is warm and quiet and cozy.  Maybe only for 20 minutes, and then he’s into the kitchen cabinets or tearing back down the hallway to see if sister or dad are ready to play (they aren’t), but that 20 minutes is awfully good.

I wish I could report extended daytime sleep as well, but he continues to insist on sub-hour naps.  Whether it’s a one-nap day or a two-nap day, he caps out at about 55 minutes.  He’s got doors to open and messes to make, I guess.

Isaac has more and more opinions about what he eats – we’ll offer meat most dinnertimes with mixed results, but yogurt is a surefire staple any time of day.  Plain yogurt with bananas and a bit of granola for breakfast, strawberry yogurt if I really want to blow his mind.  His spoon skills are on point!

The two words in his repertoire are “Mo? Mo?” (More) for when said yogurt is gone, and “Uh-Ohhhh…”, said softly as he prepares for the lecture he knows he’ll get from me when he throws his cup and spoon on the floor.

I saw a message somewhere recently from a mom of older kids speaking to moms of young kids, saying “Remember, bathtime is a gift…”  I’m prone to rolling my eyes at those kinds of “treasure-these-moments” notes, because Lady, have you seen what a mess my house is?!, but I’m kind of leaning into this one.  It’s pretty sweet, the evenings I sit back and watch Isaac roll his cars along the edge of the tub or squish bubbles in his little hands.  Juliette sometimes joins him in the tub and that’s my favorite, listening to the two of them laugh and splash while I fold clothes in Isaac’s room across the hall.

Plus, what’s better than a naked baby in a hooded towel?

And Sister.  Sister, sister!  She continues to be such a great playmate for Isaac – the two of them get huge kicks out of games of airplane or hide and seek.  She’ll crouch behind the chair in his bedroom while he runs up and down the hallway looking for her; to expedite the game, she’ll call Isaaaaaac several times over and finally he finds her and they both squeal in delight.  

Snuggles are harder to come by, but she’ll take them when she can get them!

Backseat shenanigans…they often crack each other up.

Oh, and when he’s not rummaging, he’s climbing!  

He loves the sound of the coffee grinder (again, anything loud) and starts running in circles while clapping his hands the minute I fire it up.  Life is so exciting when you’re one!

Bluey’s on!

I think this was a sick day – I can see that fevery puff to his eyes.  He can be a cheery little patient, though!

This kid looks ready to make some messes…

A rare moment of focus:

And back to the races!

His favorite song as of late is Taylor Swift’s Anti-Hero – the minute it comes on, he claps his hands and spins in circles until he’s so dizzy he can’t stand.  He’ll “jump” to the beat, which is really just squatting and then quickly standing up straight, his feet never leaving the floor.  But extra points for exuberance – his face scrunches tight as he kneels down low and then his eyes pop wide open as he reaches full height and we all laugh until our sides hurt.

Isaac, you are mischievous as all get-out, but truly, you are joy personified.