little black journal

Now that I’m back at work, I’m cherishing my weekends with renewed vigor, seizing any opportunity to get out with Juliette and Shane and enjoy the glimmering signs of spring.  A few highlights:

Last Sunday was gorgeous, so we headed out over to Seward Park in the evening to soak up the day’s final rays.  La Verne happened to be there with Nico and Jack walked over to join us – we spent a little while on the playground, perching our two bewildered kiddos on the teeter totter, and then grabbed a spot on the grass to stretch out and relax.

These kids!  Deep in conversation about….?  The Giants’ prospects this year?  Huggies vs. Pampers?  The crazy crew of parents snapping photos at their backs?

Since I’m only in the office Monday through Wednesday, my weekend gets off to a soft start on Thursday, though I’m still especially eager for Saturday when Shane will be around.  This past Thursday was gray and drizzly and Jules and I were both feeling a little funky after saying good-bye to my mom as she headed back to Oregon, but I rallied and we set out for Jefferson Park in the afternoon.  The playground was deserted, so I took advantage of the open equipment and gave Juliette her inaugural push in the bucket swing.  She dug it!  We’ll be hitting this park hard over the summer.

Friday was another rainy day – perfect weather for a cozy happy hour with the gang at the neighborhood pizza joint.  Gryffin’s smile makes me so happy.

We took a wet walk in the woods at Schmitz Park with the Rust clan yesterday.  We were all muddy-footed and soaked by the time we reached our cars, but the fresh air did us good (and helped pass that long stretch of time between morning and afternoon nap).

The clouds parted today and we drove over to Bellevue to walk the trails at Mercer Slough.  It was beautiful – moss-covered trees and promising little buds and a lovely feeling of quiet.

Spring!

Juliette sporting her latest signature accessories – spit bubbles on her chin and a drool-soaked sweatshirt.  Girl’s got style.

And…over and out.  Happy Sunday from the Schnells.

Ah, I love a visit from the grandparents!  Hearty home-cooked meals courtesy of my mom, good conversations around the dinner table, and extra hands to push the stroller or hold the baby on our daily outings.  We hit Seattle pretty hard last week, rain and shine.

We spent Monday afternoon downtown – my dad was a sport and hung out with Jules while my mom and I perused the offerings at Nordstrom Rack.

We enjoyed a sunbreak as we left the mall, but it was short-lived and we ended up ducking into the Crab Pot for fish and chips just as the rain started to fall.

Tuesday was beautifully, perfectly, un-gray and sunny, and Seattle shone in all its springtime glory.  We headed over to Green Lake for a long walk, rewarding ourselves afterward with ice cream at Molly Moon’s.

Juliette was laser-focused on my waffle cone, tossing aside the toys and plastic spoons I offered as distractions.  I refused to share my scoop of espresso ice cream, but she did sample my mom’s kumquat sorbet.  It’s just fruit, right?

And it was a hit.  Grandma forever sealed her spot in Juliette’s good graces with that one.

My dad headed back to Oregon on Wednesday, but not before one more quality chat with his favorite baby.  These two got along so splendidly – Juliette and I were both pretty sad to see him go.

My mom and I headed over to Alki on Wednesday afternoon for another vitamin D dose.  You can see Juliette fits right in with all those Seattle-ites that get giddy and silly when the sun comes out.

We spent Thursday afternoon down at Southcenter, scoring a couple of killer deals at the Loft while Juliette happily chomped on the fuzzy new lion grandma picked up for her at Target.  Turns out the three of us make a pretty good shopping trio.

I hung out with my mom’s group on Friday while my mom enjoyed the last of the week’s sunshine at Jefferson Park, and by Saturday Seattle’s spring drizzle had returned.  But no fear – the gray skies served as the perfect excuse to spend the morning at the bakery with a hot cup of coffee.  And Juliette’s good mood persisted, so I’ll hold off on complaining about the weather.

Ok, so here’s the thing – it rained ALL DAY today!  Not even the shortest, slightest break in it.  Jules and I were hoping to get out for a good walk, but it wasn’t in the cards for us.  So my mom and I left Juliette at home with Shane and drove over to Capitol Hill for oysters and wine, followed by a quick trip downtown to check out the big sale at Gap (must. stop. shopping!).

Tomorrow my mom will hang out with Juliette as I head back to the office – my maternity leave is officially OVER.

I don’t wanna talk about it.

Shane’s parents left yesterday after a week-long visit, and I must say, Miss Juliette is one lucky, well-loved little girl.  Yes, she greeted our visitors last Saturday with her signature lip-quiver (she’s in the thick of her “stranger danger” phase), but she warmed up to them within a day and spent part of the Superbowl contentedly nestled into Grandma’s lap.  It was pretty special to watch these three together, to hear Denny coo “Grandpa loves you” over and over, to see the joy on Pat’s face when her and Juliette locked eyes.  Obviously, Shane and I think our kid is the bee’s knees, but to be in the company of other people that think every little smile, every silly babble, even every spit-spraying sneeze is the sweetest thing ever?  Man, that feels good.  One of my greatest hopes for our daughter is that she’ll always feel treasured and beautiful and unique, and seeing her with Shane’s parents is like watching my wish come true.

Although much of the week was spent cozied up indoors, doting on the baby during her waking hours and waiting for her to get up during her sleeping hours, we did manage a few brief outings to our favorite Seattle spots:

A jaunt around Jefferson Park to soak in some of that freezing cold sunshine…

A walk along the waterfront, and then a seafood feast at the Crab Pot (crab legs and mussels and prawns, oh my!)…

Storytime at the Beacon Hill Library with dad, grandma, and that hilarious duck puppet…

Breakfast at Both Ways to grub on perfect buttermilk biscuits…

And a short stroll along Alki Beach yesterday, which had even the Minnesotans shivering in their boots!  We took refuge from the cold in a nearby Starbucks, and hot coffee has never tasted so good…

Shane took his parents to the airport last night for their red-eye flight, and I found myself crying a little while watching Denny and Pat give Juliette a round of tearful good-bye hugs.  Those Schnells sure are a generous, tender bunch.  Thank you, Grandma and Grandpa, for loving the heck out of our little girl.

I’m having a hard time believing that Christmas has come and gone – I’m resisting Shane’s request that we take down the tree and I still have the Charlie Brown Christmas album on repeat.  I’m so thankful for the time with family and friends, for the special holiday moments we shared with Juliette.

We headed down to Portland on Saturday, just in time to wish Morgan a happy third birthday.  This sweet girl was a little overwhelmed by all the attention lavished upon her – she bashfully smiled as we belted out “Happy Birthday”, not entirely sure what to make of the singing and the candles and the cameras.

But all sense of reserve was lost once she was told she could dig into her cupcake!  Was it really just three years ago that I was holding a newborn Morgan in my arms?  She’s such a strong-willed, fun-loving little person now.

Since my parents, Shane and I would be heading home on Christmas Eve, we opened gifts on Sunday morning.  Morgan and Elise excitedly tore into their pile of presents, while Juliette needed a little help from dad.  The sound of wrapping paper being torn was her favorite part of the whole ordeal – next year, I’m giving her a bunch of wrapped empty boxes!

Shane, on the other hand, understands the joy of a perfect gift – check out that whiskey grin!

The rest of Sunday was wonderfully low-key – we ate, we painted, we played Candyland, we napped, and as the day drew to a close, we cracked open Shane’s Christmas gift.

We set out for Alberta Street on Monday to show Jules one of our favorite Portland neighborhoods.  First stop: coffee at Barista!

Kathryn bought Mitch a ukelele from his favorite music store for Christmas, and Shane gave it a little test drive out on the sidewalk, serenading Juliette as she dozed in her stroller.

Shane, Kathryn, and I grabbed delicious Indian food from Bollywood Theatre for lunch.  Morgan and Elise were not so interested in samosas or dal or pork vindaloo, but they were quick to take us up on an offer of ice cream from Salt and Straw next door.

We capped off the day with a special pizza dinner to celebrate my mom and dad’s 43rd (!) wedding anniversary.  I loved being in a house full of family, crowding around the table at mealtimes, watching Morgan and Elise dote on their new cousin.  There were times when the hub-bub was loud and crazy and tiring (you can see below that it tuckered Jules out), but the hub-bub was also full of joy and great care for one another.  There was never any shortage of volunteers to hold the baby or clean up the kitchen or read a book to the kids.

My parents left early the next morning for La Pine, and Shane, Jules, and I strategically hit the road at morning naptime.  But first, the requisite photo of cousins on the couch:

Christmas day was quiet – we lounged around in our PJs, did some cooking, and opened our gifts from Shane’s family.  Jules can’t believe how well she made out:

It seems impossible that a year ago, this little girl was the size of a poppyseed, making a home for herself in my belly unbeknownst to Shane and I.  Best gift ever.

The Rust clan flew in from their week in Colorado on Christmas afternoon, so Shane, Juliette, and I headed over to their place that evening, bearing ham and mashed potatoes and apple pie.  It was a treat to share Christmas dinner with our Seattle family, to be back in the midst of hub-bub after such a mellow day at home.

And with that, a holly, jolly Christmas 2013 is in the books!

My mom left Wednesday after a week-long stay in Seattle, and man, I’m missin’ her already!  Yes, I will see her tomorrow when we head to Portland for Christmas, but still…I so enjoyed having her here, watching her love on her granddaughter.  And my word, it was nice to come downstairs in the morning to the smell of sizzling bacon and freshly brewed coffee!

It was a pretty quiet week – gone are the days of our several-hour shopping excursions to downtown or Southcenter, I guess. We spent a lot of time just hanging around the house, doting on Juliette and then popping in You’ve Got Mail and Little Women when she went down for her afternoon nap. My mom easily fell into our routines and rituals; she was coaxing big smiles out of the baby in no time and quickly learned what to do when those smiles went sour – I came home one afternoon after a quick run to the grocery store to find her doing laps around the kitchen with a zonked-out Jules in the stroller! I like that she saw the inner workings of our little family; she can fully sympathize now when I say that Juliette had a car seat meltdown, she knows how good it feels to lift her warm little body from the crib after a nap, she gets it when I say we had an extra cheery morning or a really tough time getting her to bed. And it was so affirming to hear her tell my grandma over the phone that I’m a good mom. Those are blessed words to hear from the woman that raised me.

My mom and I did venture out with the baby occasionally, for runs to West Elm and the neighborhood toy store to finish up our Christmas shopping, and we made multiple trips to Columbia City Bakery for Americano’s and coconut macaroons.  I like to think the three of us will be going on these coffee dates for years and years to come, even after Juliette has acquired her own taste for espresso.

Thanks so much for everything, Mom…  Jules and I appreciate every meal, every hug, every lap around the kitchen island. You may have come to help take care of the grandbaby, but you did some really good takin’ care of your daughter in the process.

On Saturday morning we loaded up our car with an ungodly amount of baby gear and headed south to Portland – Juliette’s first road trip!  Given her distaste for her car seat, we had our qualms about this little getaway; I considered calling Mitch late Friday night and telling him we simply weren’t ready to wreak that kind of havoc on our eardrums.  But I summoned my “adventurous” spirit and we pressed on with our plans, hitting the road right at naptime on Saturday and praying that Jules would fall asleep with little fuss.  And I’ll be danged, it actually worked.  She wailed for about 10 minutes around Tukwila (10 miles south of Seattle), but just as I started to cry along with her, longing to scoop her up into my arms and assure her we weren’t intentionally neglecting her, she conked out and hardly stirred the rest of the way to Portland – we made it to Mitch and Kathryn’s in record time, sanity still intact.

We spent most of the weekend just lazing around the house, enjoying Morgan and Elise as they enjoyed Juliette – it was a veritable cousin love-fest.  Morgan has adored her baby dolls for as long as I can remember, carrying them with her to bed and to the store and to the dining room table.  So you can imagine her enthusiasm over the chance to play with a real, live baby doll – she was immediately smitten with Juliette and had great fun tucking her in with her favorite blankie and her stuffed bunny, helping me with diaper changes and jammie time, tagging along when I went to get Juliette up from her naps.

Goodness, I can’t believe how much Morgan has changed in the four months since I’ve seen her.  Her hair is longer, her legs have lost that precious baby chub, and her will is stronger than ever.  She’s stubborn and sensitive and incredibly sweet (when she wants to be).

Elise also doted on Jules, with serenades on the guitar and cuddle sessions on the couch, but seeing as how she’s five, she’s very much into her big-girl stuff as well.  She started kindergarten this year and loves to play school; it turns out she is the strictest teacher on the planet, and Shane spent much of Saturday afternoon in time out for his refusal to properly follow directions.  She’s a chatterbox and a total riot – sometimes intentionally, sometimes not.  Mitch and I were discussing Christmas plans on Sunday when Elise announced that she wanted a “diarrhea”.  I raised my eyebrows at Mitch as he shrugged his shoulders and asked for clarification.

“What was that, Elise?”

“I want a diarrhea book.”

I bowed my head and stifled a giggle as Mitch delved deeper:  “You want a book about diarrhea?”

“Noooooo, Daddy, I want a diarrhea.  To write stuff in.  Karma has one.”

“Oh, you mean a diary?”

“Yeah, a diarrhea.”

By this point, I was breathless and red-faced with the effort of not laughing out loud.  Kids do say the darnedest things.

Shane and I sighed with relief and gratitude as we pulled back into our driveway on Monday afternoon – the weekend had been a smashing success.  Juliette traveled well, slept great, and soaked in some serious love from the Jarrell clan.  She’ll never have a big sister, but I suspect that these two will be pretty good surrogates.

Yesterday was the last day of Shane’s paternity leave – say it ain’t so!  I have loved having him home these last few weeks – not just because he takes the 6 am feeding shift, but because the three of us have such a good time hangin’ out together.  We made the most of his last week off, getting out (nearly) every day with Juliette for afternoon strolls at our favorite parks or lunch dates at our favorite restaurants.

A new walking trail just opened up in the greenbelt across the street from our house, so we headed out during a sunbreak last Tuesday to do some exploring.  It’s beautiful in there – thickly wooded and so quiet, save for the chirp of birds above or leaves crunching underfoot.

Despite gray skies and a forecast of rain, we drove over to Kubota Gardens on Wednesday, knowing it would be one of our last chances to take in the park’s fall colors.  We walked along the meandering paths, stopping every so often to snap a photo or give Juliette a close-up view of the bright red maples.  It sprinkled on us a bit, but we paid it no mind – we considered it Juliette’s crash course in Pacific Northwest living.

Shane’s mom arrived in Seattle on Friday morning, and after a quick snuggle session with her newest granddaughter, the four of us headed over to the 8 oz. Burger Bar for lunch, followed by a walk around Jefferson Park to burn off those truffled french fries.  Juliette snoozed through most of the outing – she wouldn’t open her eyes for a family photo, but somehow knew to wave to the camera!

We took advantage of Sunday’s sunshine for a walk along the water at Lincoln Park and then lunched at Geraldine’s Counter.  Again, Juliette snoozed…  Car seat crying was minimal this week, knock on wood!

We laid low the rest of the day on Sunday, hanging out at home and doting on this happy girl.  Juliette certainly sprouted her little devil horns from time to time this weekend, but for the most part, she was good to her grandma, cooing and smiling and wrapping yet another family member around her little finger.

Shane’s mom left for Minnesota yesterday morning, and Shane headed out the door promptly at 7:30 this morning to return to work. So it’s just me and Jules today, flyin’ solo…  Wish us luck!

I saw one of our church’s pastors yesterday, and as she gave me a congratulatory hug, she asked if Shane and I are thriving or surviving in this early phase of parenthood.  No doubt, we felt like we were in survival-mode those first couple weeks, doing whatever we could to maximize sleep and minimize tears, for Jules and for us.  But the tides seem to have turned this week, as we’ve enjoyed several days of thriving as an active, (relatively) well-rested family.

It helped that my parents were here to lend a hand with all things house and baby.  Delicious home-cooked meals every night, a spic-and-span kitchen, and obliging backup every time Juliette needed changing or soothing – Shane and I were livin’ large during their visit.  And it was such a blessing to watch grandma and grandpa fall in love with their granddaughter, to listen to my dad sing his off-key nursery rhymes while he bounced her on the exercise ball, to watch my mom’s face light up when I put Juliette in her arms each morning.

My dad headed back to Oregon last Sunday, but my mom stayed on to help out while Shane returned to work for a week.  We ventured out each day to run a couple of errands or enjoy a little fresh air, patting ourselves on the back during those meltdown-free outings and taking turns with any jiggling or shushing on those one or two occasions when Juliette fell to pieces.  I’m training my daughter early in the fine art of cafe dwelling – she dozed through our coffee dates at the Columbia City Bakery and the Essential Baking Company, soothed by the whoosh of the milk steamer.

My mom left this morning and I shed a few tears as we said our good-byes.  We grew closer these past few days, as we now share this common ground of motherhood and this common love for Juliette.  Plus, I’m really, really going to miss her cooking.

And now it’s on Shane and I to keep this boat afloat.  Thankfully, we seem to be on our way to finding a rhythm.  We’ve made great progress in the sleep department lately – our first couple of nights at home with the baby, we were taking turns sleeping with her on the couch in one-hour shifts, as she fussed each time we put her down.  We quickly became zombies under this routine, so we moved her into our bed, but stopped swaddling her, as we thought she was waking herself up as she tried to fight her way out of the blanket.  A week ago, we brought back the swaddle with more success, and on Wednesday, despite my skepticism, Shane moved her into the previously unpopular pack ‘n play next to our bed. And dang it all, I guess father knows best, because that girl logged five straight hours of Z’s that night, went right back down after I fed her, and then snoozed until 7 am!  Despite the unsettling dreams I had that night that someone had kidnapped our baby (I suppose my subconscious was trying to make sense of this long stretch of silence), I felt fabulous on Thursday morning.  We have yet to recreate that blissful five-hour stretch, but she’s been sleeping in three-hour chunks since then, and getting up around 1 am and 5 am feels doable for now.

We’ve heard that newborn sleeping and eating patterns can turn on a dime, so we’re far from believing that we have it all figured out – I suspect I haven’t experienced my last new-mama breakdown.  But for now, we’re soaking in the sweetness of this sleepy little face.

It’s been a grand couple of days – heaping loads of sunshine, quality time with friends and family, a Sunday full of rest.  Glorious.

Mitch and Kathryn rolled into town with the girls on Friday afternoon.  We spent the evening on the back porch, the guys toasting to the weekend with beer and fresh oysters, the girls with bowls of ice cream.

 

We kicked off Saturday with a bakery run, and then made our way to Jefferson Park for a playground fix.  Morgan’s face absolutely lights up when she sees a swingset – she could spend all day in one of these things.  And apparently Uncle Shane loves his swing-time as well…

   

At 11 am, the water fountains came alive and the girls squealed with laughter as they raced through the spray.  Talk about unbridled summer joy.

   

We spent Saturday afternoon with friends and family at Lincoln Park, celebrating baby Schnell’s upcoming arrival.  It was all we’d hoped our baby shower would be – lots of laughter, blessings for our little one, and dinner hot off the grill, set against the backdrop of a gorgeous Seattle summer day.

(photos by Jason and La Verne)

We were spoiled with an abundance of gifts, from snot-suckers to beautiful blankets, but our favorite present by far was this personalized piece of artwork, brainstormed by Nance.  The leaves on this tree are made up of the thumbprints of the people at the shower – it will hang in baby Schnell’s room as a reminder that he or she has a huge family of people that already love him or her, people that have walked alongside us in our journey to become parents and will continue to walk with us as we cross over from waiting to raising.  I asked Shane on the car ride home last night how we managed to get so lucky, to be surrounded by people that are so full of generosity, of genuine kindness, of a willingness to cry hard with us when we need a shoulder and to laugh even harder with us when we need to let loose.  And to think that our baby will enter the world with all of these incredible people at his or her side – there may have been a happy tear or two falling behind those sunglasses of mine.

We made it home in time for baths, books, and a quick snuggle on the back porch before bed-time.  Ahhh, Morgan – kill me with your sweetness, why don’t you?

We said good-bye to Mitch and his family this morning, after one last run to the neighborhood playground for a go at the swings and slides.  As usual, I’m already missing those Jarrell girls like crazy.  It was fun to have them in our house for a couple of days, to see them first thing in the morning, to nap with Morgan in the afternoon, to get out and enjoy our neighborhood parks in a whole new way.

The flip side to all that fun was that it left me totally tuckered out, so I Sabbathed well today: naps, baseball, reading, Thai take-out for dinner.  I found myself wondering what life will be like when we have kiddos in our house that don’t leave on Sunday mornings.  But then I rolled over on the couch and went back to sleep.  We’ll cross that bridge when we come to it.

Sighing a little letdown sigh tonight, as we said good-bye to my mom and dad this morning after a glorious summer weekend together.  Lots of home-cooked meals shared at the dining room table, lots of baseball games watched as we lounged on the couch, and oh, that sunshine on Saturday!

I’ve been plowing through berries and watermelon and mangos by the bowlful lately, so I suggested we head out to do some strawberry picking on Saturday morning.  We grabbed our crates at Remlinger Farms in Carnation and got right to work, plucking red, juicy berries by the handful.  It was a bit harder than I anticipated, squatting between the rows with my achy knees and big belly, but we pushed onward and walked away with 14 pounds of loot after an hour’s work.  Not too shabby.

We dined on deluxe burgers at 8 Oz Burger Bar for lunch, then made a run to West Elm to pick up the glider for the nursery.  Shane and my dad worked on getting the chair moved in and assembling our just-arrived crib while my mom and I sunned ourselves on the back porch – again, not too shabby!

The evening’s wispy clouds held major stellar-sunset potential, so we drove over to Lincoln Park after dinner to walk along the water and watch the sky go from blue to gold to pink.  These are the moments when the Pacific Northwest is at its absolute finest.

The tides turned on Sunday as the rain started to fall, but that didn’t get me down – it was a perfect day for Thai curry, for afternoon dozing, and for a little mall madness with my mom.  I stashed a few pounds of berries in the freezer and took my first stab at jam-making (success!), worked on the nursery a little, and called it a day after the Mad Men series finale.  It had been a very full weekend, in a very good way.

Mom and Dad hit the road back to Oregon this morning and we’re already missing their company – dinner tonight was decidedly less hearty (scrambled eggs and toast vs. pork chops and veggies…) and conversation at the table was a bit less lively.  But I’m so looking forward to seeing Grandma and Grandpa come September…